#751 The Courage to Thrive

“... vulnerability is at the center of fear and shame, 
but it is also at the center of joy and gratitude and love and belonging.”     Brene Brown

 
"The secret of happiness is freedom.
And the secret of freedom is courage."    Thucydides


“Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one's courage.”    Anais Nin


“It takes courage to endure the sharp pains of self discovery, rather than 
choose to take the dull pain of unconsciousness that would last the rest of our lives.”    Marianne Williamson


“To wake up to our lives and to develop and sustain mindful awareness requires great courage. Mindfulness is not for the faint-hearted, nor for those timid or afraid of bearing witness to the often overwhelming brilliance, intensity, and complexity of their lives and world. To care deeply enough about waking up to our lives that we apply ourselves diligently to cultivating mindfulness, is a great act of courage, curiosity, and commitment. Properly practiced the intention to sustain mindful attention is supported by the attitudes of curiosity, openness, acceptance, and loving discernment."    Joel Levey

#730 Excellence: Loving Awareness, Gratitude & Self-reflection

     Perhaps the most common misunderstanding about mindfulness is that it doesn't work in the "real world" (of competing, adversarial egos). Our ego insists, not surprisingly, that the only way to "win" is by being self-centered (noisy ego, egocentric), on autopilot (fear-based reactivity, brain stem), and ignoring our mind-heart (prefrontal cortex).
     But as we gradually mature with age, or are forced to rapidly mature (see Post-traumatic Growth: http://mindfulnessforeveryone.blogspot.ca/search?q=post-traumatic+growth) we directly experience the truth that the only real success is authenticity. And authenticity is what's left after all our conditioned defensive & offensive reactivity drops off. 
     Let's see how Lionel made out with authenticity in the "real world":

     Lionel Sanders of Windsor, Ontario, overcomes addiction & sets a new world record in perhaps the most challenging of human sporting events - the Ironman Competition, completing the grueling triathlon in 7 hours, 44 minutes, 32 seconds.
     Carol Off: It's just an absolutely remarkable story in every way — including how you got into it. Can you give your secret? What do you have to do? What do you have to have in your psyche and in your body in order to do this?
     Lionel Sanders: Sure. I think the biggest thing has been that I really try and cultivate love for what I am doing and a passion for what I'm doing. And the day-to-day training, I don't dread it. I love every minute of it. And it wasn't always that way, you know. But I always try and put into perspective of just how much of a privilege this is — just to have the use of your body. So I always cultivate that. And that brings a certain level of awareness and presence to my day-to-day training, which allows me to push my limits. And then as well, I would say the other thing is after every race, I try and look at it objectively — the bad ones in particular — and I try figure out a way to correct all the things I did wrong. And I do that after every single race, and I'll do that after this race as well. And there was still lots of things that I could improve upon for the next time around.

     CBC Radio's As It Happens, interview by Carol Off: http://www.cbc.ca/radio/asithappens/as-it-happens-tuesday-edition-1.3861211/ontario-s-lionel-sanders-overcomes-addiction-sets-new-ironman-world-record-1.3861212

Courtesy of Lionel Sanders

#544 We're Dumber AND Wiser than we Assume

     If we look back - clearly & honestly - at some (much?) of our past behavior, we're likely to be (I certainly am) grateful that anyone's stuck by us - friends or family! This is not humility, just the humbling clarity of 20:20 hindsight.
     Longstanding meditation practice is nicely described by the late Zen teacher, Shunryu Suzuki as: "one embarrassment after another!" We learn to let go of our inflated (armored) egos, we learn to open our mind-hearts towards others who are "perfectly human" like us, and thus we do actually become a bit wiser.

      “When I find myself full of fear or desire, I remember that I am dealing with a brain and nervous system that has been hard-wired for millions of years for these emotions. Then I apply one of my favorite mantras, ‘I’m perfectly human.’ When I sit in meditation as a human being rather than as an individual, I feel I am part of a collective effort on the part of our species to right itself, to find a new sanity. As Robert Thurman says of meditation, ‘It’s evolutionary sport.’ In the light of that big perspective, I thank you for being on my team.”      Wes Nisker

     See: http://mindfulnessforeveryone.blogspot.ca/2014/02/492-mindfulness-practice-real-world.html

Maryanne Gobble, National Geographic   http://photography.nationalgeographic.com

#462 Gratitude, Perception & Quality of Life

     What do I feel grateful for right now?

     Can I savour & rest in this attitude? 

     How does this attitude affect my overall perception?

     How does my perception affect my overall quality of life?

Steve McCurry  http://stevemccurry.com/

#461 Paradox of Two Perspectives

     The usual (default) way in which we perceive things - ourselves & everything else - is based on a (dualistic) self-concept which is separate from, & in an adversarial relationship with everyone & everything else. We therefore automatically expend considerable energy avoiding (aversion, anger)  stimuli we reject; while chasing after to get & keep (craving, clinging) stimuli we want. This reactive reflex is hard-wired into our fully-functional brain stem. The typical mode of existence within dualism is suffering.

     A very different way of perceiving reality (rare without training) is experiencing one's self as an inherent part of the physical universe (nondualistic). A sense of wholeness & interconnectedness ("interbeing") is usually the result of a very gradual, radical shift in perception / way of being, brought about by consistent mindfulness meditation practice. This mode of existence is characterized by wonder, gratitude, love & joy. 
     One remains fully aware of the former perspective & way of being, but it is no longer the only way, so one is no longer trapped within dualism. 

     From within dualism, the concept of nondualism may seem attractive, but the experience of it cannot be imagined. A practical approach is patient, consistent, persistent, mindfulness meditation practice. Intelligent sustained practice inevitably cultivates & matures this natural, universal human capacity.

Steve McCurry   http://stevemccurry.com/

#446 Gratitude, Service & Responsibility

     The great philosopher Huston Smith summarized a profound approach to life:

"Infinite gratitude towards all things past;
infinite service to all things present; 
infinite responsibility to all things future."

http://billmoyers.com/content/a-personal-philosophy-the-wisdom-of-faith-with-huston-smith/

     Can we acknowledge how this, and only this, total timeless engagement with life is right, natural, our only home?
     Can we recognize that anything less than such an openhearted mindful embrace of the whole is partial, incomplete, inadequate, and therefore - painfully unsatisfying?
     Can we then reduce suffering by settling for nothing less?
     Can we recognize how this is as plainly reasonable & practical as pulling a splinter out of our thumb?

     See: http://healthyhealers.blogspot.ca/2013/11/personal-deepening-universal-meaning.html

Kristiina Lehtonen - "A Message to Eternity"   http://www.kristiinalehtonen.fi

#329 Judgmental : Grateful Ratio - Impacts your Quality of Life

     It's good to learn to be aware of when we're being judgmental - harshly critical of ourselves, first & foremost. Why? Because when we're hard on ourselves, we're almost certainly hard on others as well. And we may not be aware at all of our self-criticism, and it may be "business as usual" when it comes to criticizing others. How often are YOU harshly judgmental of others?
     It's also a good idea to become aware of when our hearts are open, and aware of the fact that we owe a massive debt of gratitude to so many people for being alive, for all that we have, etc. None of us can cause ourselves to be born, to grow up, to survive. This is a thoroughly interconnected incredibly complex web of life - we depend on each other far more than we can possibly realize. Gratitude should be common, normal, dominant emotion for all of us. How often are YOU overwhelmed by loving gratitude?
     What's the ratio of times when you're judgmental vs when you're grateful? Which is more realistic ie more appropriate to or in tune with reality? Which of the two is going to make you deeply satisfied, filled with joy? Think deeply about this. You have far more control over your quality of life than you realize!

Fredrik Lonnkvist   http://travel.nationalgeographic.com

#114 Qualities or Attitudes of Mindfulness

     Jon Kabat-Zinn highlighted 7 mindfulness qualities - how one attends to information during mindfulness. 
     Shauna Shapiro et al added 5 affective qualities, yielding a total of 12:

nonjudging, http://mindfulnessforeveryone.blogspot.ca/2012/04/115-nonjudging-quality-1.html

nonstriving, http://mindfulnessforeveryone.blogspot.ca/2012/04/116-nonstriving-quality-2.html

acceptance, http://mindfulnessforeveryone.blogspot.ca/2012/04/117-acceptance-quality-3.html

patience, http://mindfulnessforeveryone.blogspot.ca/2012/04/118-patience-quality-4.html

trust, http://mindfulnessforeveryone.blogspot.ca/2012/04/119-trust-quality-5.html

openness, http://mindfulnessforeveryone.blogspot.ca/2012/04/120-openness-quality-6.html

letting go, http://mindfulnessforeveryone.blogspot.ca/2012/04/121-letting-go-quality-7.html

gentleness, http://mindfulnessforeveryone.blogspot.ca/2012/05/122-gentleness-quality-8.html

generosity, http://mindfulnessforeveryone.blogspot.ca/2012/05/123-generosity-quality-9.html

empathy, http://mindfulnessforeveryone.blogspot.ca/2012/05/124-empathy-quality-10.html

gratitude, http://mindfulnessforeveryone.blogspot.ca/2012/05/125-gratitude-quality-11.html
and 

loving kindness. http://mindfulnessforeveryone.blogspot.ca/2012/05/126-loving-kindness-quality-12.html

       Cardaciotto L. Assessing Mindfulness: The Development of a Bi-Dimensional Measure of Awareness and Acceptance. PhD Thesis, Drexel University, 2005.

dspace.library.drexel.edu/retrieve/4264/Cardaciotto_LeeAnn.pdf

  

     These overlapping, interdependent, characteristic qualities or attitudes are cultivated by, & naturally arise from, mindfulness practice - much like physical strength, aerobic fitness, perseverance, etc arise for athletes from their training regimen.

#81 Conscious Awareness

     “Much of what happens in the mind is not within consciousness, yet these non-conscious processes have an impact on our health. Bringing these negative thoughts, such as fear, hostility, betrayal, or sadness, to awareness is part of basic health, because those thoughts – what in (psychiatry) are called unintegrated neural processes – are basically like black holes. They have so much gravity to them that they suck the energy out of life. They influence the health of the mind, its flexibility and fluidity, its sense of joy & gratitude. They impact relationships, leading to rigid ways of behaving or explosive ways of interacting. They also influence the body itself, including the nervous system and the immune system.
     So an exploratory process like mindfulness that brings those fearful negative thoughts to awareness can be very beneficial. Sometimes you have to name it to tame it. A number of studies suggest that when you bring something into awareness, and describe it, you can move that previously negative energy – a draining thought or cognition – into a new form.
     With mindfulness, what was not available to awareness becomes available. We need to support people in that journey, because bringing more of what’s going on in the mind to awareness can be a very helpful development in a person’s life.”
       Daniel Siegal MD, clinical professor of psychiatry, UCLA School of Medicine.

Photo: LolloRiva   www.dpreview.com