#578 Civilized Behavior?

     It's quite amazing how differently some people describe themselves from how they actually behave - fail to "walk the talk." And they may actually believe at least some of what they're saying.
     High, rigidly-held, often loudly-professed moral & other standards, are difficult to live up to. So we may try, but keep falling short, and can't tolerate the disconnect. Therefore, we suppress the disconnect, to ourselves & others, any way we can. 
     The greater the disconnect, the less self-respect we have. Others see our hypocrisy far more clearly than we allow ourselves to see it. Hypocrites don't fit in civilized society. Whether living in a small tribe or in today's global village, one's reputation as a dependable, beneficial part of the community is everything. Living a divided life is miserable on all levels. The fact is, we can't ever truly get away with anything!
     Rigidity & perfectionism are serious psychological handicaps. Lying is a rampant social disease.

     Mindfulness training is about learning to see things - including ourselves - clearly, with kind acceptance, no matter what we see. In this wise way, we can let go of all dysfunctional coping strategies, and start living a congruent, undivided life. This is civilized.

#577 Awareness or "Ordinary Mind" - Choosing Wisely

     Mindfulness training reduces stress by letting us function at a higher level of consciousness.
     Our "ordinary mind", is very useful when assigned certain specific tasks eg solve a math problem. But let loose, it tends to grind out an awful lot of unhelpful, to agonizingly disruptive material (wallowing, catastrophizing, daydreaming, anxiety, confusion).
     Awareness, on the other hand, is marked by clarity, silence, stillness, peace, timelessness, kindness, and joy. Note the absence of struggle, stress and suffering. This level of consciousness is our birthright as human beings - homo sapiens sapiens. Over thousands of years, we've been gradually evolving to inhabit this level of consciousness with increasing stability. Mindfulness practices are designed to help us get there in THIS lifetime.
     We're so conditioned to identifying with (instead of simply using) "ordinary mind", that it's our default mode of consciousness AND way of being. Stressed out, struggling, inefficient is how we see ourselves! Even while taking an 8-week Mindfulness course, some participants drop out when their academic / work stresses rise! These folks trust ordinary mind when what they need is the more efficient, more effective, stress-free, higher level of consciousness. This, like other aspects of our conditioning, needs to be deeply examined and questioned. See: http://mindfulnessforeveryone.blogspot.ca/2014/10/576-practicality-of-prioritizing-quality.html

     Very closely related to trusting the old grit your teeth & grunt approach to work over a more mindful approach, is ignoring self-care and trusting that putting everything directly into one's work is the answer (to what ?). See: http://healthyhealers.blogspot.ca/2014/10/quality-of-life-for-one-for-all.html

     A funny, yet very serious aspect of "trust" to examine deeply, in one's own life: http://mindfulnessforeveryone.blogspot.ca/2014/02/492-mindfulness-practice-real-world.html

IraE   www.dpreview.com

#576 Practicality of Prioritizing Quality

     When we compare a homeless alcoholic guzzling the handiest liquid intoxicant (including mouthwash, hair tonic, etc), with a sophisticated wine connoisseur, we tend to identify with the latter. 
     For one, it's all about becoming intoxicated as quickly as possible - mindlessly escaping reality.
     For the other, it's all about quality, with little or no intoxication - consciously savouring reality.

     All of us can be connoisseurs of our own life! We can carefully monitor the quality of our current thoughts, speech, and behaviours for lasting, timeless quality by asking:
          • Do these lead to stress and suffering, or to the end of stress and suffering?
          • If these lead to stress, are they necessary?
          • If not necessary, why do these again?
          • If these lead to the end of stress, how can I master these as skills?                                           Thanissaro Bhikkhu

#575 Struggle & Stress - vs - a Better Way of Being

     You might find it useful to question the very idea of struggling, striving etc to get somewhere / something, or become someone / something - as opposed to effortlessly shifting awareness towards who you actually are. We can only experience the latter - which we might call "discerning awareness" - in inner silence & inner stillness, via meditation, nature, mature love etc.
     As soon as we introduce words, concepts, images, we’re back into egocentric conflicts - “me against the world.” Our identity has nothing really to do with self-images or even ideals – those are mental concepts, dummed-down operationalizations that the mind can easily manage. Reality is well beyond the mind’s abilities, and thus the mind / ego doesn't wan’t to deal with it.
     What would happen if you changed nothing at all in your life EXCEPT stopped struggling? Example: If, immediately after you took a sharp knife away from your very young child, she yelled that you're the worst Mommy in the world, you would probably completely ignore the potential assault on your ego, and instead, seamlessly, would see how to turn this near disaster (cutting herself) into a teachable moment to nurture your child. THIS is being a hypoegoic verb appropriate to life. Was there struggle & suffering?
     We ALL have the capacity to behave THIS MINDFULLY in ALL situations, and thus CAN minimize / eliminate suffering for ourselves AND others. It is literally a matter of patient, intelligent practice.

October near Lewis Lake, Nova Scotia, Canada

#574 Trying Really Hard and Feeling Frustrated?

     Life can be chronically, irritatingly frustrating - particularly for those of us who put an awful lot of time, effort and gut-wrenching desire into our work. We know we're putting more and more into it, yet the "returns on investment" are pitiful. We assume, that if we set our mind on a goal, any goal, with enough determination, sacrifice, effort, smarts etc, it's simply a matter of time before we achieve it. Then, and only then, will we gain worthiness, approval, respect, admiration, security, peace, and yes - even love. At some future point, but certainly not now, we're much too busy now, we will earn happiness.

     I have direct experiential awareness of this scenario, but fortunately, I'm less & less trapped in it. It's sad but interesting to see friends and colleagues in this same boat. Why do we strive so hard? Why are we so "driven"? Are you stuck in this mud up to your eyeballs?
     The two Nasrudin stories below may shed some clarifying perspectives:

       A man noticed Nasrudin intently inspecting the ground outside his door. 
       “Mulla,” he said, “what are you looking for?”
       “I’m looking for a ring I dropped,” Nasrudin replied.
       “Oh,” the man replied as he also began searching. “Well where exactly were you standing when you dropped it?”
       “In my bedroom,” Nasrudin replied, “not more than a foot in front of my bed.”
       “Your bedroom?!“ the man asked. “Then why are you searching for it out here near your doorway.
       “Because,” Nasrudin explained, “there is much more light out here.”


       One day, Nasrudin began talking to a man from another town. The man lamented, “I am rich, but I am also sad and miserable. I have taken my money and gone traveling in search of joy-but alas, I have yet to find it.” 
       As the man continued speaking, Nasrudin grabbed the man’s bag and ran off with it. The man chased him, and Nasrudin soon ran out of the man’s sight. He hid behind a tree, and put the bag in the open road for the man to see.
       When the man caught up, he located the bag, and his facial expression immediately turned from distress to joy. As the man danced in celebration of finding his bag, Nasrudin thought to himself, “That’s one way to bring joy to a sad man.”  

       Both Nasrudin stories from: http://www.rodneyohebsion.com/mulla-nasrudin.htm

Tribute to the Group of Seven

#573 Wise Effort in Meditation - Effortless, Instant

     "The next time you sit in meditation, notice how often you get lost in thought. What causes that drift into thinking? Did you deliberately try to lose yourself? If not, then getting lost in thought was not your responsibility.
     Now notice when you have awakened out of thought. You may take credit for waking yourself up, but the noticing you are no longer lost in thought occurs after having awakened out of it. 
     You cannot take responsibility for losing yourself or waking back up. What really happens is a mystery.

     The less we do to establish or cultivate awareness, the more it reveals itself."


       Rodney Smith. Awakening. A Paradigm Shift of the Heart. Shambhala, Boston, 2014.

#572 What is the Most Important Meditation We Can Do Now?

“Critical thinking, followed by action.
Discern what your world is;
notice the plot, the scenario of this human drama;
and then figure out where your talent might fit in to make a better world.
And each of us must do something that makes our heart sing,
because nobody will want to do it with us if we’re not passionate & inspired.”                       Dalai Lama

From the inspired 2010 documentary movie: "I Am" http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1741225/

#571 Learning What 'Just This' Holds

     Sitting in meditation, thought proliferation may arise: "When is this going to be over? I have a lot to do. I'm getting fidgety. Let's get the show on the road! etc etc etc"

     "When we want something to be over, we lose compassion for ourselves, now."                      John Tarrant

     Can we fully accept self-talk, and set it aside for now? Can we learn to settle for "just this"? 

     Suppose we have a silent, peaceful dimension - without self-talk or other noise, without any time-related issues.
     Just for the duration of this sitting, can we - without any agenda - simply rest in silence, stillness, peace?

#570 What Remains When Self-talk is Released?

     In Mindfulness practice, as we gradually, gently learn to let go of identifying with incessant self-talk (“thought proliferation”), and become more engaged with the physical experience of the present moment ("just this"), we experience interesting shifts. 

     This (or any other) statement / concept, in itself as a thought, is merely equivalent to self-talk - "blah, blah, blah ...". 
     BUT how are you experiencing this? How does it impact your one, fleeting, precious life?

#569 Clear Objective Self Awareness

     Everything we think, say and do has, or had, some perceived benefit in our life. Even the vilest, most reprehensible forms of human behavior have, or had, some perceived benefit in the perp's life.
     Mindfulness training helps us see, with increasing clarity, what we're thinking, saying and doing now, and whether our current way of being is appropriate to our current circumstances.
     The "momentum of our life" has a lot of momentum! But inevitably, our old ways of thinking, speaking and behaving become "old", losing both their charm and effectiveness. Objectively looking at these, compassionately letting go of what clearly was beneficial in the past, but is no longer, and trying better approaches makes perfect sense. Of course there will be things that we're already doing effectively - great, we can do more of these. 
     See clearly; be kind; do less of what doesn't work; do more of what does. Sounds reasonable.

Fort Beausejour by Robert Rutherford (2013)  www.fogforestgallery.ca