#758 Towards Stillness ...

     Mindfulness practice gradually leads us from feeling uncomfortable in our own skin, distractions & mindless compulsive activity, towards stillness, peace & seeing things as they are, clearly, right here & now, and appropriate responses.

     “… meditation practice can show you how helpful the practice of restraint can be. You sit … and you don’t move. If you’re uncomfortable, you remain sitting still with the discomfort for an entire half hour. You do not move. You don’t get up after five minutes just because you have an odd thought; you stay with it and see what happens.
     When we hold still, we create a field of clarity for ourselves. We learn restraint. Yes, there are parts of the self that resist that clarity, and then the body jumps into movement to cloud the field: we scratch our nose, rearrange our limbs, and shift our attention. And we miss the moment of holding still, of clarity and readiness. Doing this practice for many years, I find that learning restraint in this way is especially valuable for people like me who jump around from one thing to the next. The restraint of holding still allows me to enter a state of presence and intimacy that I wouldn’t get otherwise. Without it, I might embarrass myself by getting up and walking out of the meditation room!
     But learning restraint is much more important. In terms of sex, anger, and greediness, restraint can be the key to compassion and skillful action. When we’re ready to do something really unskillful, suddenly a little shadow of awareness comes up in our minds, and we don’t abuse, we don’t yell, we don’t grasp; we just stay still. In that moment of restraint, we can discover our own strength, our own integrity.” Pat Enkyo O’Hara

#746 Attention Theft

     Mindfulness is to be practiced continuously, otherwise, in our digital age, we're almost continuously mindless:

     "Every time you open your phone or your computer, your brain is walking onto a battleground. The aggressors are the architects of your digital world, and their weapons are the apps, news feeds, and notifications in your field of view every time you look at a screen.

     They are all attempting to capture your most scarce resource — your attention — and take it hostage for money. Your captive attention is worth billions to them in advertising and subscription revenue.

     This might sound familiar: In an idle moment you open your phone to check the time. 19 minutes later you regain consciousness in a completely random corner of your digital world: a stranger’s photo stream, a surprising news article, a funny YouTube clip. You didn’t mean to do that. What just happened?

     This is not your fault — it is by design.

     The digital rabbit hole you just tumbled down is funded by advertising, aimed at you. Almost every 'free' app or service you use depends on this surreptitious process of unconsciously turning your eyeballs into dollars, and they have built sophisticated methods of reliably doing it. You don’t pay money for using these platforms, but make no mistake, you are paying for them — with your time, your attention, and your perspective."

       Tobias Rose-Stockwell. "This Is How Your Fear and Outrage Are Being Sold for Profit

The story of how one metric has changed the way you see the world." https://medium.com/the-mission/the-enemy-in-our-feeds-e86511488de

#737 Prolific Conceptualisation

     Most of us are well aware of our tendency to "go off on a tangent", while thinking, speaking, or looking something up on the internet. We start off on one specific topic, and before we know it, quite unintentionally, we're way, way off on a totally unrelated topic and may not even remember what we started with. Especially problematic forms of "thought proliferation" play central roles in depression (wallowing) and anxiety (catastrophization). But since we all seem to do "normal" thought proliferation, we mistakenly assume that it's harmless. 

     Buddhist psychology considers our tendency to spin off into the past, future, or sideways - away from present-moment reality - a central cause of suffering.
     "The vicious proliferating tendency of the worldling's consciousness weaves for him a labyrinthine network of concepts connecting the three periods of time through processes of recognition, retrospection and speculation. The tangled maze with its apparent objectivity entices the worldling and ultimately obsesses and overwhelms him."
     Bhikkhu Kantukurunde Nanananda. "Concept and Reality in Early Buddhist Thought. An Essay on Papanca and Papanca-Sanna-Sankha." Buddhist Publication Society, 1971. www.seeingthroughthenet.net

     In meditation practice we clearly see when we're overthinking things, we let thoughts go, and remain continuously grounded in reality, directly experiencing (without words & concepts interposed) moment-by-moment, the ever-changing present moment.

Some activities hold our complete attention!

#639 Mindfulness in the Real World

     Many of us, even if we have some mindfulness practice under our belts, underestimate the practical importance and impact of mindfulness on our day-to-day life.
     We (incorrectly) tend to assume that our usual way of being & doing things (ie mindless / autopilot) is practical, effective - "necessary to survive in the real-world".
     Conversely, we (incorrectly) assume that mindfulness is impractical - akin to "being the nice guy" in a world where only SOBs "succeed".
     However, our mindless default state, being egocentric, mostly ignores others, where we are, the present moment - so it's profoundly alienating. Everyone keenly notices whenever we lack interest, attention, caring. There's no engagement, no quality of connection, no quality of life. We may well be seen as irrelevant, burdensome, an energy drain.
     When we're being mindful, others readily perceive our "presence". They feel the vitality of a powerful connection between us: attention, caring, empathy, kindness flows unobstructed. Quality engagement defines interpersonal quality of life. We cultivate a "magnetic personality".
     Mindfulness is a product of sincere, open-hearted practice. It's not easy, but nothing of profound value is.
     See: http://mindfulnessforeveryone.blogspot.ca/search?q=presence

#623 Sanity 101 - From Trance to Agency

     We're surprisingly often caught in the momentum of a trance. Something triggers the memory of an old, meaningful event (pleasant or unpleasant), and we suddenly:
          • Overreact (our "button was pushed");
          • Freeze, become incapacitated by anxiety / fear;
          • Simply zone out, off in an imaginary world.
     Too often we don't engage appropriately with life, in real time. This seriously compromises our character, quality of life, and efficacy.

     Mindfulness practice helps us quickly recognize when we're "off" ie inappropriate to our present situation. We strengthen "the muscle" that efficiently, seamlessly brings our attention back to right here, right now, thus stabilizing concentration. Continuous awareness of, and appropriately responding to one's current circumstances, is the very basis of sanity.

#609 Short-term Gain, Long-term Pain

     We routinely criticize politicians for making promises they can't possibly deliver; as well as for planning only as far ahead as the next election. Why would they use such dishonest, short-sighted, mindless approaches that guarantee problems later on? Because it works - this is how most of us think, so we elect them!
      Honestly examining the roots of our problems, and personally doing our part to correct these are signs of profound maturity & wisdom. Only a tiny proportion of us is interested. For most, regardless of the image we try to project to others or even to ourselves, deep introspection & moral responsibility are very uncomfortable matters we do our best to avoid. Deep down, we don't think we have what it takes.
     So most of us avoid the deep realities of life by clinging to distractions - for our entire lives, if we can. Happy, happy, busy, busy. But reality is extremely difficult to handle with an immature consciousness. In fact, wisdom traditions suggest that our only problem is an immature consciousness!

          “No problem can be solved from the same consciousness that created it.”                                      Albert Einstein 

     Mindfulness practices are gentle, progressive trainings to help us clearly see & accept our "ordinary mind", and thus be able to transcend it - evolve to a higher level of consciousness. THEN we can engage reality with awareness, using all our multiple intelligences. 
     We CAN effectively deal with life's core challenges, rather than try to hide from them in distraction.

#554 Interpersonal Engagement

     It's both fascinating and sad to closely observe a person's eyes as you speak to them. The listener's eyes obviously glaze over when they become disengaged - when they don't want to hear what you're saying.
     Why does such disengagement happen SO OFTEN?
     It surely can't be due to lack of importance of the subject matter. After all, most of our conversations are "small talk" ie the topic itself is of minimal importance. Small talk is a way of socializing. And it probably isn't the quality of the delivery of the message - most of us are far from being gifted speakers.
     Two major possibilities remain: the listener already knows or thinks they know what is being said (potential boredom) OR the listener is not ready to hear what's being said (potential stress).

      Could the cause be common mindlessness? Could intentionally remaining open mind-heartedly engaged - despite (supposedly) knowing all that your friend is about to say, or despite assuming that you can't take it all in - be a more powerful form of human bonding than common small talk? Could this become a practical part of your mindfulness practice?

 

Early Morning Mist on Eagle Lake

#542 Do We Know What We Need?

     In a recent excellent 2-part CBC radio documentary "Re-wiring Our Kids", host Pauline Dakin presents evidence suggesting that we're becoming so engrossed in & distracted by digital media, that our awareness of our own emotions is markedly dampened. Digital distraction may well be today's "opiate of the masses."
https://www.cbc.ca/atlanticvoice/2014/02/20/re-wiring-our-kids/

     Yet isn't it our emotions that warn us that we're suffering, and our emotions that energize us to make changes in order to improve the quality of our lives? 
     Mindfulness practices serve as a potent, vital antidote to the mind-numbing effects of digital distraction, materialism, cynicism, etc.

Resident of Tuscany

 

#537 Appropriate Behavior Takes Time AND Practice!

     How many people do you know who, no matter what:
1) laugh heartily, 
2) blurt something out,  
3) laugh heartily, then 
4) rush off? 

     Typically there's nothing funny, and they don't stop long enough to hear or understand what you have to say. 
     Is this really supposed to represent meaningful human interaction?

     Do I enjoy a regular daily sitting meditation practice? If not, then in all likelihood, I too lack what it takes to consistently engage - with an open mind-heart - with whomever & whatever the present moment holds.

     See: http://healthyhealers.blogspot.ca/2012/07/introverts-contribute-much-more-than.html 

Cotton Coulson, National Geographic   http://photography.nationalgeographic.com

#491 Holding Things Lightly in Awareness - Observing Change

     Meditation is often said to be "simple but not easy." When we first start to meditate, we're advised to sit still, yet we notice that we often suddenly move to scratch ourselves or make our legs more comfortable. Initially we tend to (mildly) rebel against this instruction & rationalize our not following it by arguing that one simply has to move, because ... Then quickly we may suddenly conclude "I'm no good at meditating."
     So even this tiny, initial fragment of sitting meditation practice provides a fascinating mirror by which to observe ourselves. Yet this mini-challenge, along with everything else, will change.
     The trick is not to struggle against it (against yourself), but hold it all lightly, in awareness.

Elena Shumilova  http://www.flickr.com/photos/75571860@N06/11874722676/

#400 Do I Have a Choice? - the Jar of Soil & Water Metaphor - Part 3

     Experience tells us that our attention habitually focuses & "clings to" whatever we find most attractive or aversive. This is a subjective, emotion-driven, survival-based reflex. Psychologists talk about "approach-avoidance dichotomy" - see: http://healthyhealers.blogspot.ca/2013/04/fear-avoidance-ineffective-existential.html 
      The vast majority of potential "objects of consciousness" (tiny particles of soil) never reach our conscious awareness because they simply aren't interesting enough, positively or negatively. Extremes (larger particles of soil) grab our attention, while the infinite shades of gray in between don't.
     The power of attraction or repulsiveness of an object can be likened to magnetic pull or push between poles of two separate magnets. It's as if this power were inherent to, was within, the object. Wild tigers - avoid; ripe berry - grab & eat; attractive potential mate - capture & drag back to cave. This primitive binary reflex was appropriate, yet remains functional (brain stem) so we continue to feel jolts of attraction or aversion. These jolts can feel so powerful, that we can feel overpowered by objects of desire or aversion - "I couldn't help myself!"
     Yet, none of these jolts are absolute imperatives to approach or avoid - there are infinite shades of gray even withing each object, as well as the context of each object. In this light, each object approaches zero charge, opening up many nuanced appropriate choices & behaviors. None of these "objects of consciousness" (soil particles) are inherently, by nature irresistible nor horrific - the felt "power" is from within - our selective focus of attention (eg "love is blind" or "blinded by hatred") creates the apparent attractiveness or aversiveness we have towards the object. Most importantly, from a practical standpoint we CAN up- or down-regulate this entire process.
     If we spend a lot of time (selectively) focused only on how wonderful it would be to own a particular luxury item (ignoring all negative & neutral aspects of the object itself, as well as the context of how our life would differ if we owned it), the power of attraction of this item will progressively grow more surely than if we had spent an equivalent amount of time watching the best professionally-produced ads for this item. For the power of aversion, the exact same holds true for time invested selectively focusing on the aversive aspect of an object (eg catastrophizing). Habits of mind are made powerful through our own powerful, predictable mental training. If we don't like the resultant power over us, we clearly can & should stop building it up - let the object-specific process (eg craving a BMW) undergo disuse atrophy ("what you don't use, you lose") and change the focus of our mental training towards different, healthier preferred goals. The power is literally in us (clear water) not in the objects of consciousness (soil particles). Specifically, awareness (clear water) is inherently equanimous, balanced ie does NOT have to STICK to the soil particles, which can freely sink to the bottom of the jar.
     Smoking-cessation is logical, healthy & beneficial for all concerned, YET to free themselves, most smokers need to participate in effective smoking cessation programs. We are so bound to our habits, the "momentum" & direction of our lives is so challenging to alter, that most of us need to participate in effective, systematic training programs - like mindfulness-based stress reduction (MBSR) - to achieve this evolutionary change in our consciousness & behavior.

Fence and Silo by John England     http://www.fogforestgallery.ca/bios/bio_england.html