#619 Wise, Effective Response to Stupidity, Chaos, Violence & Suffering

     “For me there was a pivotal moment after experiencing the war and massacre in Lebanon in 1982. This was a time when hope for humanity seemed almost extinguished. And in the middle of the bombed out ruins of a refugee camp, an old Palestinian man offered me coffee in the midst of the rubble. I saw in his being the indomitable nature of the human spirit shining through. I saw the light that shines in the darkness. I saw the part of us that can never be extinguished. I’ve encountered this light in kindred spirits, amplified in spiritual masters, and in the lives of those beloved beings who have been raped, abused and tortured and yet who choose to forgive and show us all the path to transformative healing.

     Whether you believe in God or not, I think it would be impossible to sustain your activism without making contact with that light. Einstein realized that we had to discover whether or not it is a hostile universe. The mystic earns the privilege of experiencing love at the core of the universe. It is my wish that every activist would come to experience this reality also.”                                                            James O’Dea

          OMTimes.com          December C 2014 edition 
          http://www.editions.omtimes.com/magazine/2014-12-C/index.html

Hemad Nazari, National Geographic   http://photography.nationalgeographic.com

#588 To Evolve OR Blame? - THAT is the Question!

     As we start to practice sitting meditation, all sorts of apparent impediments arise: mental, physical & emotional irritations that we blame on the practice, teacher, room, time of day, hunger, noise, weather, work, our own ineptitude ... We find all sorts of excuses for not being able to just sit still.
     Mindfulness practice is a structured process that can enable us, initially, to simply remain aware and accepting while sitting comfortably - how stress-free can we get! The more we train, the more able we are to rest in awareness during increasingly challenging "real-world" situations.
      Paradoxically, the more completely we let go of excessive self-concern ("noisy ego"), the greater our freedom and true happiness. Charles Dickens' "A Christmas Carol" is a powerful study of this universal human process of transformation or evolution of consciousness / heart-mind, found outside of, as well as within, all wisdom traditions.

Winfield Parks, National Geographic   http://photography.nationalgeographic.com

#527 What Can We Do About Toxic Environments?

     We instinctively pull away from unpleasant, difficult situations, people, activities, and are attracted to pleasant, comfortable situations, people, activities. It's the well-known approach-avoid dichotomy see: http://mindfulnessforeveryone.blogspot.ca/2012/03/65-embracing-full-catastrophe.html
     One very unfortunate consequence of this tendency is that when things start going awry in one's surroundings eg a colleague's behavior becomes disruptive, we're apt to avoid dealing with it in a timely, direct manner. We find it unpleasant, we may fear negative consequences from speaking to the person, we may feel incompetent intervening, we may not want to hurt the colleague's feelings, etc. Many of us have minimal training or skills in the behavioral sciences.
     Without constructive intervention, problems tend to persist or escalate. We'll often continue to avoid addressing the offender, because now it's really out of hand - way too much for us to handle. Now we may be grumbling incessantly about the problem with other colleagues, behind the offender's back, and even behind the backs of management, who could & should address the problem. Soon we're also grumbling about management for allowing the problem to get out of hand! THIS is the perfect recipe for poisoning one's environment. This is how a collegial, collaborative, family-like atmosphere can easily be turned toxic - not by the one troubled colleague - but by all the bystanders - the "nattering nabobs of negativism."

     So what is an appropriate, intelligent response (instead of avoidance) to such problems?  
     1) awareness & acceptance of problems
     2) approach & investigate them with curiosity 
     3) learn & apply skills to solve them early
     4) institute proactive preventive measures

     We can learn to become competent in any arena.  Competence transforms unpleasant difficulties that we may once have avoided, into manageable, even interesting challenges. We can become truly proactive by initiating a cultural shift in which training & competence in the psychosocial realm becomes a valued, integral part of our educational system. 
     See: http://healthyhealers.blogspot.ca/2013/04/fear-avoidance-ineffective-existential.html
     and: http://mindfulnessforeveryone.blogspot.ca/2013/01/270-interpersonal-conflicts-inevitable.html

Peet J van Eeden, National Geographic   http://photography.nationalgeographic.com

#472 Liminality in Illness AND Health

     While we have youth, good health & abundant energy, it's so easy to take these for granted, and focus our worries on relatively trivial matters. As the many & varied challenges of aging start creeping in, we marvel at young peoples' good fortune - which for us is now "slip-sliding away". When life-threatening illness arrives, we're suddenly thrown for a loop. This is how most of us sleepwalk through life - on autopilot.
     But we're ALL, ALWAYS changing, and everything around us is also CONSTANTLY changing. Stability, of any kind, at any age, is an illusion. Reality has nothing to do with solid permanence - everything is liminal!
     Successful adaptation involves perceiving things clearly, accepting life as it is, improving external circumstances as much as practical, AND adjusting ourselves optimally to situations that cannot be improved (serenity prayer). This is thriving in the real world - the world of liminality. 

     "The concept of liminality stems from the work ... on ritual and rites of passage. Van Gennep suggested ‘the life of an individual in any society is a series of passages from one age to another and from one occupation to another’. Typical rites include life events such as: pregnancy, birth, marriage and death. Rites of passage can be divided into three stages: preliminal rites (rites of separation), liminal rites (rites of transition) and postliminal rites (rites of reincorporation). A rite of passage begins by ‘severing connection’ with a previous social state or position, followed by an ambiguous time where individuals find themselves ‘in-between’ social positions, and ends with ‘re-entry’ or ‘rebirth’ into a new social position.

     Rites of passage are not restricted to movement between ‘ascribed’ statuses such as those associated with birth, marriage and death. They also apply to entry into a ‘new achieved status’, for example, membership of a certain group. Turner was particularly interested in the ‘sociocultural’ properties of the liminal (transition) period, asserting that liminality is an ‘interstructural’ situation where culturally recognized positions, such as being married, single, an infant, etc. no longer apply. Liminal people are structurally ‘invisible’ - they are ‘no longer classified and not yet classified’, and therefore are ‘betwixt and between’ structural classification. As such, they are often described as being on the threshold, or margins. Living in the liminal (or transition) period can therefore lead to feelings of ‘ambiguity and paradox’. Yet, Turner also suggested that transition can be transformative. In fact, Turner described liminality as a ‘stage of reflection’ where ‘the reformulation of old elements in new patterns’ occurs, with liminal people re-entering society at a higher social status."

       Blows E et al. Liminality as a framework for understanding the experience of cancer survivorship: A literature review. J Adv Nurs 2012; 68(10): 2155-64. 

#460 Waking Up - OR - Suffering

     “We become disabled, unable to function in areas of our lives that evoke feelings we’ve never learned to tolerate. Turning away from this primary pain creates a second, ongoing level of suffering: living in a state of contraction and constricted awareness.”                          John Welwood

        Glickman M. “Beyond the breath. Extraordinary mindfulness through whole-body Vipassana meditation.” Journey Editions, Boston, 2002.

      “The most powerful agent of growth and transformation is something much more basic than any technique: a change of heart.”                                                       John Welwood

      “We have little choice about anything, moving around as we do in a sleepy, anxious cloud of habit and conditioned response. … The only choice we have anyway is to wake up.”                                                               Stephen Butterfield

       Welwood J. ed. “Ordinary magic. Everyday life as spiritual path.” Shambhala, Boston, 1992.

#418 Cognitive & Emotional Changes from Meditation Practices

     "The contemplative traditions from which commonly taught meditation practices have arisen are clear in identifying affective qualities as central targets of the contemplative practices. Kindness, compassion, and equanimity are all regarded as qualities that can be cultivated and enhanced through mental training. Indeed, the cognitive changes that are also hypothesized to occur with mental training, such as improvements in certain components of attention, are viewed in these traditions as building blocks and tools to facilitate the most important types of transformation, which are in the emotional realm."

       Davidson RJ. Empirical Explorations of Mindfulness: Conceptual and Methodological Conundrums. Emotion 2010; 10(1) 8–11.

Val Bueno   www.dpreview.com

#362 Finding Humanity's Common Core Goals & Values to Make Life Workable

      “In addition to meditation’s use as a self-regulation and self-exploration strategy, it has also been used as a technique for self-liberation and for compassionate service to the world. Within the traditional religious contexts, these four aspects of meditation have been understood as part of a developmental continuum, with the lower levels necessary, but not sufficient, for the attainment of the next level. The goal of meditation at its deepest level has been liberation from the egoic self; developing a sense of harmony with the universe; and the ability to increase one’s compassion, sensitivity, and service to others. These goals may include, but also go beyond, personal self-regulation or self-exploration. For example, meditation as a stress management technique can be learned just for its self-regulation effects (eg to calm the mind) or for its help in deepening caring for others. As a subject in one of our meditation research studies noted, ‘relaxing and clearing my mind helps open my heart.’
     Although there are differences and complexities in efforts to determine unifying principles across spiritual (and secular humanistic) traditions, there are in fact some common goals and values. These include emotional transformation – decreasing unwholesome qualities/evil inclinations, while increasing qualities of love and compassion; service to others, justice, ethical living, right action.”

       Shapiro DH. Examining the content and context of meditation; A challenge for psychology in the areas of stress management, psychotherapy, and religion/values. Journal of Humanistic Psychology 1994; 34(4): 101-135. 

Udayan Sankar Pal   www.facebook.com/UdayanSankarPal

#361 Beyond "Stress Management" - Resilience for Real Life

      Our life will include several catastrophic events - death of loved ones, end of relationships, accidents, financial setbacks, humiliations, job losses, serious illnesses, etc - "shipwrecks" - where our life, as we once knew it, ends. “To undergo shipwreck is to be threatened in a total and primary way. … what has dependably served as shelter and protection and held and carried one where one wanted to go comes apart. What once promised trustworthiness vanishes.”
       Parks SD. Big questions, worthy dreams. Mentoring young adults in their search for meaning, purpose, and faith. John Wiley & Sons, San Francisco, 2000.
 
     There is NOTHING we can do to reliably prevent these from happening. A bruised ego will want to play the irrational, immature blame-game - detrimental on many levels. What we CAN do, is intentionally mature, so we won't just survive these storms, but will thrive! Mindfulness meditation practice is an excellent time-proven way of achieving that. Some discomfort - "growing pains" - are normal signs of progress in this practice - a very small price to pay. “As you go deeper into your practice, there will be times of great inner tension followed by release to the point of weeping. If you have not experienced this at least several times, you have not yet really practiced.”
        Kornfield J, Breiter P. A still forest pool. The insight meditation of Achaan Chah. Quest Books, Wheaton IL, 1985.

     IF resilient, after a shipwreck "we wash up on a new shore, perceiving more adequately how life really is – there is, eventually, gladness. It is a gladness that pervades one’s whole being; there is a new sense of vitality, be it quiet or exuberant. Usually, however, there is more than relief in this gladness. There is transformation. We discover a new reality beyond the loss. Rarely are we able to replace, to completely recompose, what was before. The loss of earlier meaning is irretrievable and must be grieved and mourned. But gladness arises from the discovery that life continues to unfold with meaning, with connections of significance and delight. ... There is deeply felt gladness in an enlarged knowing and being, and in a new capacity to act.
     ... the gladness on the other side of shipwreck arises from an embracing, complex kind of knowing that is experienced as a more trustworthy understanding of reality in both its beauty and terror.” 
       Parks SD. Big questions, worthy dreams. Mentoring young adults in their search for meaning, purpose, and faith. John Wiley & Sons, San Francisco, 2000.

     Our task is to discover a freedom that's independent of all circumstances & times.
     Kornfield J, Breiter P. A still forest pool. The insight meditation of Achaan Chah. Quest Books, Wheaton IL, 1985.

     See: Readiness for Change http://mindfulnessforeveryone.blogspot.ca/2013/11/436-readiness-for-change-is-pivotal.html

Udayan Sankar Pal   www.facebook.com/UdayanSankarPal

#85 Phoenix Process

     “Everything can change in a moment; we have little control over the outer weather patterns as we make our way through the landscape of life. But we can become masters of the inner landscape. We can use what happens on the outside to change the way we function on the inside. This is the moral of the great teaching myths. The hero conquers a monster; the heroine completes a quest; the reward at the end was there all along – the true self, the awakened consciousness. Joseph Campbell said, ‘What all myths have to deal with is transformation of consciousness. You have been thinking one way, you now have to think a different way. Consciousness is transformed either by the trials themselves or by illuminating revelations. Trials and revelations are what it’s all about.’
     When we have been through a trial and survived it – or better still, transformed its terrors into revelations – then we begin to approach other adversities with a different attitude. Change & loss may still knock us off the horse, but soon we are back in the saddle, stronger & wiser than ever. As life progresses, and we continue to transform and refine our consciousness, we gain more insight & humility, greater strength of character, and deeper faith in the meaningfulness of life.
     But how do we do this? How do we transform terror into revelation? How do we stay sane & courageous in the midst of a trial? … the process of transformation (is) a journey of brokenness leading to openness, descent to rebirth, fire to Phoenix. Difficult journeys are best taken in a sturdy vehicle, or at least with a trusty guide & a helpful toolbox. …
     The practices I used most often to stay on track during a Phoenix Process are meditation, psychotherapy, and prayer. These tools continually encourage me to keep my heart open and my mind awake when I would prefer to shut down or go back to sleep. The practice of meditation has helped me develop a steady heart and a less reactive & agitated mind. Psychotherapy had opened me up to an inner world of cause & effect. At a critical time, it pushed me to take responsibility for my own happiness – to stop waiting for that elusive someone or something to mend & define me.
     Sometimes … meditation & therapy – seem tedious & boring; at other times they can be intimidating & challenging. We may want to give up. But the hard work demanded by a Phoenix Process, and the courage required to break open & stay open, are worth every moment of struggle. The payoff is enormous: We come into the liberating presence of our authentic self.”

     Lesser E. “Broken open. How difficult times can help us grow.” Villard, NY, 2005.