#500 Changes, Ambivalence & Progress

     Most of us start Mindfulness training with the (realistic) hope & expectation that we'll become better able to handle life's stresses. Clearly, we ourselves expect to change, becoming more resilient, thus being able to enjoy an improved quality of life.
     Though we're intent on changing ourselves - at the same time - we're deeply ambivalent. This ambivalence is perfectly natural & healthy. We tend to identify with a certain sense of self, self-concept or ego, which we (mistakenly) assume to be permanently fixed & stable. Change to one's self-image feels threatening, and may evoke fear & anxiety. Knowing this, and realizing that our self-concept is actually constantly evolving over time, and remembering that we are, through Mindfulness practice, intentionally promoting & guiding the natural evolution of our consciousness, we can become consciously aware of, & accept our natural ambivalence, and proceed gently, at our own healthy, physiologic pace.

#472 Liminality in Illness AND Health

     While we have youth, good health & abundant energy, it's so easy to take these for granted, and focus our worries on relatively trivial matters. As the many & varied challenges of aging start creeping in, we marvel at young peoples' good fortune - which for us is now "slip-sliding away". When life-threatening illness arrives, we're suddenly thrown for a loop. This is how most of us sleepwalk through life - on autopilot.
     But we're ALL, ALWAYS changing, and everything around us is also CONSTANTLY changing. Stability, of any kind, at any age, is an illusion. Reality has nothing to do with solid permanence - everything is liminal!
     Successful adaptation involves perceiving things clearly, accepting life as it is, improving external circumstances as much as practical, AND adjusting ourselves optimally to situations that cannot be improved (serenity prayer). This is thriving in the real world - the world of liminality. 

     "The concept of liminality stems from the work ... on ritual and rites of passage. Van Gennep suggested ‘the life of an individual in any society is a series of passages from one age to another and from one occupation to another’. Typical rites include life events such as: pregnancy, birth, marriage and death. Rites of passage can be divided into three stages: preliminal rites (rites of separation), liminal rites (rites of transition) and postliminal rites (rites of reincorporation). A rite of passage begins by ‘severing connection’ with a previous social state or position, followed by an ambiguous time where individuals find themselves ‘in-between’ social positions, and ends with ‘re-entry’ or ‘rebirth’ into a new social position.

     Rites of passage are not restricted to movement between ‘ascribed’ statuses such as those associated with birth, marriage and death. They also apply to entry into a ‘new achieved status’, for example, membership of a certain group. Turner was particularly interested in the ‘sociocultural’ properties of the liminal (transition) period, asserting that liminality is an ‘interstructural’ situation where culturally recognized positions, such as being married, single, an infant, etc. no longer apply. Liminal people are structurally ‘invisible’ - they are ‘no longer classified and not yet classified’, and therefore are ‘betwixt and between’ structural classification. As such, they are often described as being on the threshold, or margins. Living in the liminal (or transition) period can therefore lead to feelings of ‘ambiguity and paradox’. Yet, Turner also suggested that transition can be transformative. In fact, Turner described liminality as a ‘stage of reflection’ where ‘the reformulation of old elements in new patterns’ occurs, with liminal people re-entering society at a higher social status."

       Blows E et al. Liminality as a framework for understanding the experience of cancer survivorship: A literature review. J Adv Nurs 2012; 68(10): 2155-64. 

#433 Very Brief Mindfulness Exercise - the Plank

     What makes this a mindfulness exercise, not simply a physical one? Is there such a thing as only a physical exercise, without effecting the mind and emotions?
     First of all, this popular, very effective core-strengthening exercise can be done with straight arms (strengthens the upper body more) resting on the palms of the hands OR (as illustrated) on the forearms (strengthens the abdomen more). Shoes are optional. The body is held straight (as illustrated). What's not obvious, is that all the leg muscles are active, the belly is allowed to move up towards the spine, the shoulder area is intentionally connected by muscles to the chest, sides of the body & back, the neck & jaws are allowed to relax.
     Start with a modest time that you can do fairly easily - perhaps 30 seconds. Repeat this daily for a week, taking Sunday off, then up it to 60 seconds per day, daily, etc. Use a timer to let you know when the session is over. Gradually keep increasing the time (by 30 seconds each week, up to 5 minutes or so) so as to maintain a steady mind-body training effect.

     The mindfulness part: 
     • Welcome all perceptual inputs from your body into awareness. Allow these to FILL awareness COMPLETELY.
     • Notice & gently let go of words, forceful effort, & any concept of time. Awareness does NOT have any ROOM for these (see above).

     You are practicing noticing and letting go of extraneous friction, noise (unnecessary suffering); WHILE stabilizing simple direct contact with what is real. This is profoundly healthy, beneficial, & takes a few minutes per day.
     This may be the easiest, most efficient Mindfulness practice - try it - notice all that may happen over the course of a few weeks. Remember, stay open - everything changes - see: http://www.johnlovas.com/2012/01/intention-shifts.html

http://nbfit.net/wp-content/uploads/2013/03/plank1.jpg

#321 Fear of: Change, Loss of Security, Loss of Community, Loss of Old Sense of Self ...

     Fear is a very basic emotion; Love is its opposite. 
     Fear causes us to shrink away from reality as it is, to shrivel up, to become small, heavy, rigid, isolated, out of touch with reality. 
     Love allows us to expand and embrace reality as it is, to blossom, become light, porous, flexible, to engage the universe with an open mind-heart.
     If we allow ourselves to mature, or better yet, actively take steps to mature as conscious human beings, we will continuously experience changes in how we perceive our selves and our worldview. This is the normal process of healthy adult maturation. An intelligent adult should not expect to freeze their views on life's most meaningful questions. Life is complex and ever-changing - so are we.
     A loving, mature, intelligent community encourages growth and maturation among its members. This is the kind of community one requires if one is to become a fully functional, mature member of a civilized society.

     See also: http://mindfulnessforeveryone.blogspot.ca/2013/04/313-being-stressed-out-is-optional.html

Luis Marden - National Geographic

#35 Reality Titrated

     Seeing things more clearly, with greater awareness, needs to be balanced with greater acceptance. Why? Because we often avoid seeing things as they are.
     Experiential avoidance is defined as "unwillingness to experience feelings, thoughts and sensations, as well as attempts to alter them." We try to avoid facing reality when we're not ready to deal with it. Avoidance strategies are at best only temporarily effective.
     Healthy maturation requires that we progressively come to terms with the way things actually are. Mindfulness practice involves intentionally, non-judgmentally holding in awareness, all that the present holds.

     Mitmansgruber H et al. When you don't like what you feel: Experiential avoidance, mindfulness and meta-emotion in emotion regulation. Personality and Individual Differences 2009; 46(4): 448-453.
     Chawla N, Ostafin B. Experiential avoidance as a functional dimensional approach to psychopathology: an empirical review. J Clin Psychol 2007; 63(9): 871-90.

Photo: Pat Curley   www.dpreview.com