#719 What's Our First Priority? And How's That Working?

     Automatically, reflexively, by default, we "look out for #1" - "me, myself & I" - we're self-centered. We're primarily concerned with our own safety, nutrition, shelter, health, wealth, power, prestige, fame, etc, etc, all of which, we assume (hope), means our personal happiness will be more or less assured. And there's nothing wrong about wanting to be happy - it's perfectly normal & reasonable.
     Many of us behave as if our happiness will increase in proportion to our health, wealth, power, fame, and the opulence of our clothes, homes, cars, vacations etc. But research shows that above a certain surprisingly modest family income, which permits having reasonable basic necessities, there's NO gain in happiness or quality of life with increasing wealth. I see parallels with ethanol consumption - a drink or two may feel good; being drunk does not; while alcoholism is heading for "rock bottom".
     Doesn't the phrase "Looking for love in all the wrong places" somehow resonate? If we're at all self-reflective, we'll notice a hunger or yearning that we can't seem to satisfy for any length of time, no matter what. Smart, young, energetic university students often seem certain that they control their own futures. Ahhh, the sweet illusion of control! However, as the decades flow by, we repeatedly see just how little control we have over our own & our loved ones' lives.
     The healthiest, most intelligent approach to transcending this hunger or yearning is found by discovering our true identity - who we really are. Wisdom traditions have known this for thousands of years: http://jglovas.wix.com/awarenessnow#!The-Real-Voyage-of-Discovery-New-Eyes/c17jj/56afc4e40cf2062bd412b06e

#606 Spacious Awareness

     For most of us, our default level of consciousness is one in which "I" and "mine" are the axis around which the universe turns. In other words, we're normally egocentric, self-absorbed, at times self-obsessed, and thus by necessity, we're stuck in an adversarial relationship with everyone and everything else. It's critical to clearly see this. Self-awareness is humbling, so we compulsively seek distraction - today's "opium of the people".

      “Self-absorption in all its forms kills empathy, let alone compassion. When we focus on ourselves, our world contracts as our problems and preoccupations loom large. But when we focus on others, our world expands. Our own problems drift to the periphery of the mind and so seem smaller, and we increase our capacity for connection - or compassionate action.”          Daniel Goleman "Social Intelligence: The New Science of Human Relationships"      www.goodreads.com

     Mindfulness practices help us see clearly and accept our far-from-perfect conditioned selves. The upside is that we also become aware of a qualitatively higher level of consciousness. At this level of awareness, we experience spaciousness, clarity, generosity, freedom, stillness, silence, loving-kindness, joy - the polar opposites of claustrophobically agonizing about "me & mine". Spacious awareness is always at hand - in fact we're it - whenever our "noisy ego" doesn't drown it out. While screaming, a baby cannot appreciate that his loving parents are right there trying to soothe it.
     As we progressively shift from being egocentric to allo- and ecocentric, appropriate self-care & self-compassion remain. We're AS important - not more, not less - as other human beings. Normal, healthy maturation is transcending an unhealthy, exaggerated degree of self-concern ie self-obsession, and opening our heart-minds to embrace & nurture all that we encounter, right here, right now.

Jonathan Shapiro   www.dpreview.com

#412 Failing to Embrace Reality, We Miss Out on Miracles

     Most of us miss out on innumerable "ordinary miracles" each and every day. Why? Because we're in a self-absorbed trance, running from ghosts from our past, chasing after fantasies of future happiness, all the while ignoring the wonders of our one rare and precious life.

     We miss truly seeing our loved ones changing in real time, we miss nature's endlessly mysterious beauty, we miss even our own physical presence on this precious earth - life passes us by, yet sadly, most of us have never really lived. The stories below illustrate our propensity for sleepwalking through life:

     "New Yorkers who love a good bargain missed a golden opportunity Saturday, when the artist and provocateur Banksy, whose sly graffiti art adorns collectors' walls, opened a sidewalk kiosk in Central Park to sell his work for $60 apiece.
     His first sale came hours after opening, when a woman bought two canvases for her children. She negotiated a 50 percent discount on the pieces ...
     The offerings included small and large canvases, including a version of "Love Is in the Air." A limited edition of that work sold for $249,000 at auction this summer."
http://www.npr.org/blogs/thetwo-way/2013/10/14/234023611/collectible-art-at-street-prices-banksy-sells-pieces-for-60?utm_content=socialflow&utm_campaign=nprfacebook&utm_source=npr&utm_medium=facebook

     In January 2007, virtuoso Joshua Bell performed incognito, on a violin worth millions of dollars, at a metro station in Washington DC. This was an experiment organized by the Washington Post. His performance received very little interest from passersby.