#503 Self-talk & Identity

     During Mindfulness training we learn to notice, accept & then let go of self-talk, seamlessly bringing attention back to the object(s) of awareness. Is self-talk merely an innocent distraction? Sometimes ...
     Sometimes self-talk is encouraging - "Common, you can do it!" This may be useful - for a while.
     Too often, self-talk is self-defeating - "Oh no, not standing meditation! The last time we did that it was soooo uncomfortable! I don't want to do it now! I don't ever want to do it again! I so much prefer sitting meditation" etc etc etc. Such self-talk very effectively trains us to self-sabotage. The more we listen to & engage with this, the more these statements become - in our minds - hard facts, until the contents become "who we are" (cognitive fusion). Unhelpful self-talk clearly needs to be noticed early, accepted, & let go - gently - but definitely let go.
     Isn't it odd that we have to repeatedly remind ourselves that our core identity is NOT a pathetic collection of rigid preferences, dislikes & can't do's? We are SO MUCH MORE than that. But until we thoroughly let go of the former sticky fiction, we hold ourselves back from living the latter reality.

     See: http://mindfulnessforeveryone.blogspot.ca/2013/04/311-fearful-child-wise-grandparent-were.html
     and: http://mindfulnessforeveryone.blogspot.ca/2013/08/381-each-moment-new-beginning.html

Bronwyn Proven   http://photography.nationalgeographic.com

#499 What is there to Accept?

     "Growing up" is an interesting process. A wise parent introduces new experiences to her child very gradually, so that these changes stimulate healthy growth & maturation. We know that exposure to too much, too early, results not in healthy maturation but counterproductive stress.
     However, our maturation process extends far past the time we leave home - it truly is "lifelong learning". So we ourselves must, consciously & unconsciously, become our own gatekeepers - ideally titrating new material at a pace we find growth-stimulating. Unfortunately, some of us can't say no, taking on way more than we can handle well; while others get stuck in the opposite rut - living very small, boring, unchallenging lives. What we assume we can't handle well, we consciously & unconsciously avoid, delay, suppress, oppose etc.
     Through mindfulness training, one of the many things we become increasingly consciously aware of, and learn to accept, is our current gatekeeper role, how it affects our life, and the fact that the actual quality of our life is literally in our hands.
     Then, upon becoming aware of models & roadmaps of normal psychosocial development (evolution of consciousness, or maturation), we realize that human potential is literally beyond anything we can currently imagine. We become & remain aware of, & accept the fact, that we're up in the air, sitting alone at the controls, flying our own personal helicopter called "this life" to destinations we've never experienced before. This is both amazing & daunting. We're called to be our own personal highly-skilled gatekeepers, sports psychologists, & life coaches.

     See: http://www.johnlovas.com/2012/01/post-traumatic-growth.html
     And: http://www.johnlovas.com/2014/02/meditation-is-powerful.html

Healer by Steve McCurry   stevemccurry.com