#699 Humility & Mindfulness

     "Some people think that humility is thinking lowly of yourself; some people think it's not thinking about yourself. 
     But to me, the best definition of humility is radical self-awareness from a distance. Seeing yourself from a distance, and saying 'What's my problem?'.  ...
     Success is earned externally, by being better than other people.
     Character - that unfakeable goodness - is earned by being better than you used to be."

       from David Brooks' interview (below) by Judy Woodruff, about his new book: "The Road to Character." Random House, NY, 2015.

#581 Character is Built upon our Choices

     Which of these two paths leads to true, lasting peace, joy & happiness? We ALL, repeatedly face this CHOICE.

     Path One: Surrounding yourself by people who agree with your rationalizations for past mistakes & failures, who agree that it was completely other peoples' fault, who agree that you're a victim of ..., who agree that you should get back at them - "lawyer up" etc, and who agree that there's no use trying because the world's not fair.
     This is the common, relatively easy path of the masses. It props up the ego - solidifies your old "identity". It is for those who can't see beyond "ordinary unhappiness."

     Path Two: Listening to one or more trusted people who advise you to deeply examine your mistakes & failures, who advise you to honestly face your role in these, who advise you to make amends to the people who were likely hurt by your actions, and then vowing to lead a meaningful life that you yourself, your family, and even strangers can respect and trust.
     This is the uncommon path, requiring strength, bravery and persistence. It is chosen by those for whom "ordinary unhappiness" = "a life unexamined" = "a life wasted." Here one transcends the ego, opening to "deeper degrees of truth about yourself, others, and the nature of mind. More and more, you live in awareness." (Larry Rosenberg)

     At any time, we can choose to leave behind an unsatisfying way of life, and start living one that's increasingly meaningful and inspiring to ourselves, our family, our community.

Keith Willette, National Geographic   http://photography.nationalgeographic.com

#383 Locus of Control & Self Development

     To a far greater degree than we realize, we ourselves govern the trajectory of our character development. We personally evolve our own consciousness - and inextricably with this - the quality of our life.

     "Human development has been seen for a long time as a passive process shaped by environmental forces acting on an individual's genetic predisposition. Though this approach in developmental psychology explained human nature to a large extent, it failed to address a number of questions regarding an individual's own contribution to his/her development. ... The limited empirical research on intentional self development available so far suggests that a fairly significant proportion of adults, especially youth, see themselves as active agents in their own development, set personal growth-goals, experience a sense of cognitive engagement in such goals and work towards realizing such goals."               Bhattacharya A, Gupta C, Mehrotra S. Intentional self development: A relatively ignored construct. Journal of the Indian Academy of Applied Psychology 2013; 39(1): 18-25.

     "Locus of control ... refers to causation as perceived by individuals in response to personal outcomes or other events. ... A person's 'locus' is conceptualized as either internal (the person believes they can control their life) or external (meaning they believe that their decisions and life are controlled by environmental factors which they cannot influence)." http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Locus_of_control

      “There exist within us … latent but unexplored creative capacities, depths of psyche, states of consciousness, and stages of development undreamed of by most people.”
       Walsh R, Vaughan F eds. Paths beyond ego. The transpersonal vision. Penguin Putnam Inc, NY, 1993.

#364 Being your own Trainer, Sports Psychologist & Life Coach

     The will to repeatedly put a little bit more quality, a little bit more intelligence - the "right effort" into each activity - to behave mindfully - comes from deep within us. This will is referred to as "heart", "spirit", "character", "intestinal fortitude" or "show us 'what you're made of'". If we learn to consistently dig down deep to manifest that "little extra", we are training ourselves to become progressively stronger, more competent, and more resilient. We transform ourselves into an elite individual, a champion in our chosen field of interest. In other words we intentionally remodel "what we're made of" - our mind, body & emotions - physically & functionally, for the better. Also, we become a fine personal trainer, sports psychologist & life coach to ourselves.

     "Water boils at 100°C, not at 99°C. That 1° of intensity makes all the difference. Workouts are similar ... If you aren't getting results, up the intensity!"               encouragement handwritten on Dalplex exercise room board

     “I’ve always believed that if you put in the work, the results will come. I don’t do things half-heartedly. Because I know if I do, then I can expect half-hearted results. That’s why I approach practices the same way I approached games. You can’t turn it on and off like a faucet. I couldn’t dog it during practice and then, when I need that extra push late in the game, expect it to be there.”         Michael Jordan, NBA MVP 1988, 1991, 1993, 1996, & 1998.
     See also: http://mindfulnessforeveryone.blogspot.ca/2013/06/348-heart-of-mindfulness-practice.html
     and: http://healthyhealers.blogspot.ca/2013/06/basic-essential-life-skills-need-to-be.html

alan-tunnicliffe   www.dpreview.com

#191 The Battle vs the War

     It's easy to become disheartened by difficulties and obstacles that incessantly block our path. We all fantasize (much more than we realize), especially when trying to achieve some worthy goal, that God, Mother Nature, or "The Force" should walk on ahead of us to sweep away all annoyances and petty hindrances!
     That line of "reasoning" is flawed in many dimensions. First and foremost, difficulties in life spare no one. You are not alone! And the kicker: one's intelligent, conscious interaction with difficulties is precisely what creates a mature evolved person. In fact, truly successful well-rounded people typically have had a surprisingly challenging life - see Kenneth R. Pelletier's remarkable 1994 book: "Sound Mind, Sound Body: A New Model for Lifelong Health." Simon & Schuster.  https://drpelletier.com/
     So sticking it out, be it in a marathon or a job, may be the polar opposite of martyrdom and self-abuse - it may well be exactly what you need to grow as a human being. Accepting the inevitability of loosing many battles along the way helps us win the war - and emerge as an evolved wise person.