#273 Mindful Deep Listening - Letting Go of Compulsive Fixing / Doing

     I’ve “made many mistakes because I didn’t understand the importance of validating the feelings of others, nor did I know how. I thought it was my duty to solve the problems, expressed or unexpressed, of my family, friends, and others I knew. Learning that I don’t have the power to solve other people’s problems, even those of my own family members, and that by validating their feelings appropriately I empower them to be their own problem solvers has significantly increased the quality of our relationships. In addition, I have witnessed a far greater measure of success in their personal lives, and an increase in the quality of my own.”

       Lundberg G, Lundberg J. I Don’t Have to Make Everything All Better. Six Practical Principles that Empower Others to Solve their Own Problems while Enriching your Relationships. Penguin Books, 1995. 

 See also: http://mindfulnessforeveryone.blogspot.ca/2012/03/64-just-as-things-are.html