#608 Fearing the Shallows & Depths

     This morning, in a local jewellery store, I saw a collection of clay wall hangings, each with a woman's face on top, and a slogan, meant to be funny, below. On one of these was written:
          "Deep down, I'm really shallow!"

     This is dark humor - trying to deal with something that's actually terrifying. I think a large proportion of us, women and probably more so men, go to great lengths to remain constantly distracted so as to avoid seeing clearly who / what they are deep down. They fear that their own character / psyche / soul is at best shallow, at worst wicked. This is a hangover from the dark ages of clerics terrifying people with burning in hell forever unless they pay clerics to pray for them. How could, or indeed why would we live meaningful, dignified lives if we believe that we're "rotten to the core"?
     All the world's wisdom traditions have intelligent, educated, well-meaning, civilized representatives. Also, all have shrill representatives who've miraculously evaded a thousand years of human evolution, and misery loves company.
     Meditation practices are avoided at all costs by those who fear getting to know themselves (as well as those who gain by propagating this fear). In meditation we do directly experience the "shadow" aspect of ourselves - the less flattering aspects of our personality that everyone else clearly sees, but which otherwise remains hidden from us. But seeing & understanding our shadow has nothing to do with encountering "the devil". Becoming aware of this part of our subconscious helps us mature and behave as responsible, civilized adults.
     Fortunately, meditation also lets each of us directly experience the very best of human nature. Each of us, fundamentally, is kind, spacious awareness. This wise, mature, civilized aspect is amply able to hold the relatively small, transient shadow aspect.
     Mindfulness practices, which are all forms of meditation, are ancient, time-proven practices, specifically designed to foster human evolution of consciousness. In other words, we CAN intentionally promote our own psychosocialspiritual maturation - but ONLY IF we can overcome fear-based avoidance.

Bess learning from Gretel

#473 Why Train in Mindfulness?

     Most people are drawn to Mindfulness when they find life overly stressful. Their usual coping mechanisms are simply inadequate to the burden that today's pace of life imposes. So at least initially, their interest tends to be focused on Mindfulness "as a self-regulation strategy in addressing stress & pain management and enhancing relaxation & physical health."
        Shapiro DH. A preliminary study of long-term meditators: Goals, effects, religious orientation, cognitions. Journal of Transpersonal Psychology 1992; 24(1): 23-39.

      So why so much stress in a time of plenty? Is it possible that many of us have lost - or never found - our bearings, spending most of our time & energy chasing after relatively meaningless things? Before we reach meaningless goals, we ride the anxious energy of the chase. But after achieving them, profound disappointment quickly sets in. We sense we're wasting our precious life. After repeating this chase-&- catch routine too many times, the pattern becomes obvious, and hopefully we can stop "doing more of what doesn't work!"

      "Man's search for meaning is the primary motivation in his life."      Viktor Frankl 

     The beauty of doing meaningful work is that daily life becomes & feels worthwhile, significant. In the process of doing something of value, we live meaningful lives. Instead of stressed, we feel engaged, energized to contribute. But to know what is meaningful for us as individuals, we must first discover who or what we are. To help accomplish this intentionally, sitting quietly and observing the pattern of our thoughts & emotions is exceptionally useful. Welcome to mindfulness meditation!
     See also: http://mindfulnessforeveryone.blogspot.ca/2013/11/432-i-try-and-i-try-but-i-cant-get-no.html