#517 First Self-acceptance Then Self-knowledge

     What we find unacceptable in others, we naturally find unacceptable in ourselves. Rejecting others is relatively easy. When it comes to aspects of ourselves that we judge unacceptable, it's easier for us to suppress these, becoming consciously unaware or "blind" to our own "faults".
     When we deeply deny our own unacceptable aspects, we see or "project" these imperfections onto others and in them we find these all the more reprehensible. We judge others very harshly for having ( our ) qualities that disgust us. An extreme example is narcissistic personality disorder (below). The sickest example is scapegoating - ethnic, religious & other forms of "cleansing".
     Obviously, healthy maturation involves progressively greater degrees of self-awareness, self-acceptance, and empathy for self & others as we slowly become truly civilized & gradually earn our title: homo sapiens sapiens.

     “Narcissistic personality disorder is named after Narcissus, the youth from Greek and Roman mythology who falls in love with his own reflection in a pool. While the term narcissistic is commonly used to describe people who believe they are better than everybody else, in psychiatric terms, it refers to patients who unconsciously believe they are defective & deeply flawed. In order to mask their self-hatred, they develop a veneer of false confidence and superiority over others. Often, this takes the form of being highly critical and setting up impossibly high standards for people in their lives. But this only serves to alienate others, leading to rejection, loneliness, and sometimes suicidal depression.”
     Carlat D. Unhinged. The trouble with psychiatry – A doctor’s revelations about a profession in crisis. Free Press, NY, 2010.