Wednesday 30 October 2013

#425 Arising Urges to Be a Squirrel

     I'm quietly working on something, then suddenly an urge arises to do something else. One moment I'm peacefully engaged in an activity, the next moment I'm slightly anxious - an emotion, then the urge to act by going off mentally and or physically. The actual nature of the "something else" could be anything at all & doesn't really matter - it could be planning a vacation, work on another project, what's for dinner?, need to urinate, what time is it?, desire for coffee ... 
     This is precisely what keeps happening - and we see it so much more clearly - during sitting meditation! We're sitting still, engaged in the act of observing the breath, then suddenly the focus of our attention slips off target, onto another topic. Why does this happen? The longer we remain on the new topic(s), the more momentum (energy) the stories we tell ourselves gather. This weaving of stories is mental activity, which in turn may prompt physical activity eg getting up & doing something, or it may remain in an intermediate stage of planning to do something. In sitting meditation, we train to let go of this "anxious quiver of being", and gently return to being peacefully engaged with what we've decided was appropriate activity for this set period of time ie properly engage with the process of meditation for the predetermined time period.
     Why are we anxious being peacefully engaged in appropriate activity? Why do we trust primitive squirrel-like random thinking/doing activity (analogous to randomly trying different number sequences to open a found combination lock) more than deliberate peaceful action arising from the much more evolved aspects of ourselves? Could it simply be that we're so used to using the old primitive part of the brain that we don't yet fully trust this newfangled prefrontal cortex?

     See "Trust": http://mindfulnessforeveryone.blogspot.ca/2012/04/119-trust-quality-5.html


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