#695 Accepting Ourselves, Accepting Others, and Then ...

     We keep trying so desperately to be accepted, valued and loved. We're acutely aware, at some level, of our many imperfections. And we fear our very survival hinges on eliminating, hiding, or overcompensating for our "defectiveness".
     After a while, we start realizing that nobody is perfect; and that unconditional love is painfully rare. Imperfection is tolerable, but life without unconditional love is brutal. What can we do about it? We know that we can't make others do anything. 
     But we can learn to accept ourselves as we are, then it's relatively easy to accept others as they are, and then, perhaps, we ourselves can become the source of unconditional love - the absolutely most precious, nurturing aspect of life. Perfection within imperfection?

     “When you came into this world, you cried and everyone else smiled. You should so live your life that when you leave, everyone else will cry, but you will be smiling.”                         Paramahansa Yogananda
        Dana Sawyer “Huston Smith: Wisdomkeeper. Living the World’s Religions. The Authorized Biography of a 21st Century Spiritual Giant.” Fons Vitae, Louisville, KY, 2014.

Public Gardens, Halifax, NS

#520 Imperfections - Others' & Ours

     It's so easy to see how others fall short of our standards of perfection. It's impossible for anyone, including for us, to live up to these standards. Our deluded judgments that arise from this cause a lot of problems - see: http://mindfulnessforeveryone.blogspot.ca/2014/04/517-first-self-acceptance-then-self.html
      An ancient wise advice is to not judge others for messing up, but to see how we can learn from their mistakes to help make our own behavior more skillful. This is infinitely wiser than labeling them as "bad guys", while fooling ourselves that we're "the good guys". We're all perfectly human, doing our imperfect best.