#454 Divided Life - or - One Continuous Mindfulness Practice?

     For some of us, dressing up, going to school or work, behaving professionally and doing our tasks, all feel phoney. It all feels like "acting" to earn money so we can put food on the table, and be able to do the things we really enjoy doing & be ourselves. The sense of having to work, having to expend (minimal) effort, producing products & services that (barely) meet standards under tight supervision, are the natural result of living a divided life. This breeds an us-against-them, adversarial attitude between students & teachers, between staff & management. There's no engagement, no personal investment or initiative - the "real me" wants to be elsewhere. This is presenteeism - the land of the walking dead. A huge desire, & unrealistic expectations arise for any opportunity to escape drudgery: weekends, holidays, and the holy grail - retirement. Such students & workers complain because they're truly unhappy, & externalize their unhappiness, believing that the cause lies outside of themselves. Their teachers & bosses usually don't understand the underlying psychology, but do look forward to replacing them with far more collaborative, vital, engaged people.
      Of course it's perfectly normal to sometimes have "a part" of us want to stay home from work - go skiing or read a good book. However, it's also perfectly normal & healthy for another "part" of us to want to go to work and fully, authentically engage in our profession. All play & no work also makes Jack a dull boy! Judging either work or play all good or all bad is extreme, unbalanced & unhealthy.  
     Even retired wealthy individuals feel the need to contribute meaningfully to society. So how can healthy young people possibly feel phoney by working? Is it not that their ideas of "meaning", "self" & "worldview" require maturation?
     These are not simple matters of morality. None of us have had ideal childhoods, full of unconditional love, stable healthy wealthy wise families, friends, etc. But we do have to start where we are - right here, right now. The opposite of externalizing all our problems is seeing all that we encounter as a learning opportunity. We can choose to be fully engaged with, directly experiencing every moment of life with our heart-mind open.
     It is possible to live authentically through continuous mindfulness practice.

Don Pentz - Flood Tide, Broad Cove   www.fogforestgallery.ca