To the extent that these requirements for happiness are unexamined, unconscious, and thus NOT of our own choosing, they have a stranglehold on our life.
My late aunt repeatedly said that as long as her only daughter remained with her partner (whom my aunt disliked), my aunt could never be happy. This type of vow is common and effective. My aunt died unhappy.
This is tragic AND completely unnecessary. We need to become consciously aware of all the barriers *** we ourselves erect to keep us from embracing life fully. We need to become consciously aware of all the hounds that chase us, as if we were rabbits - and - all the rabbits that we chase, as if we were hounds. Most of us, most of the time, without any apparent choice in the matter, are in fact flipping between hound and rabbit roles. This is both exhausting and miserable.
Fortunately, we know the PHYSICAL FEELING of chasing, and also of being chased. When we become aware of this common form of being OUT OF CONTROL, of "being driven" instead of doing what we want to do, we can pause, center ourselves with the feel of our breath in our belly, bring ourselves into the present moment, and choose to do what is appropriate to the present circumstances. FRESHLY EMBRACE THIS VERY MOMENT. This is the definition of sanity by any standards.
*** "Growth fundamentally means an enlarging and expanding of one's horizons, a growth of one's boundaries, outwardly in perspective and inwardly in depth. ... Growth is reapportionment; re-zoning; re-mapping; an acknowledgment, and then enrichment, of ever deeper and more encompassing levels of one's own self."
Wilber K. "No boundary. Eastern and Western approaches to personal growth." Shambhala, Boston, 1979.
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| Wong Heng Meng http://travel.nationalgeographic.com |
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